This article was written by Tolly Moseley on SexWithEmily.com. To read the full article, please visit https://sexwithemily.com/fall-sex-positions/

If there’s any sexual activity that’s gotten way, way more popular in the past few years, it’s ye olde friends with benefits. That’s not just my opinion: it’s research. And while that’s great news for anyone interested in alternative relationship configurations, the friends with benefits setup does require some solid interpersonal skills — if you’d like to avoid drama.

When you’re a pacifist, pleasure-loving individual, who’d also very much enjoy a friends with benefits arrangement, not to worry. Justin Lehmiller has some research-backed pointers on FWB’s and what makes them successful, on everything from initiation to maintenance. (We interviewed him on that very subject.) So here are six steps to pursuing one, without undue tears/angry texts/general malaise. Right this way for benefits—the friendly, sexy kind.

Step 1: Be selective.

If you’d like to initiate a friends with benefits dynamic, one of the best things you can do for yourself is to be picky. Just because it’s not an “official” relationship doesn’t mean you have to throw standards out the window, so when assessing potential candidates, here are three things to think about:

• Am I attracted to them?
• Are they a good communicator? (More on that in a moment)
• Are the circumstances conducive to this?

The first one should be easy to assess, the second we’ll cover more in-depth. But the third question is crucial, because the best candidate will likely be someone who already occupies some healthy distance in your life. A family friend? Yeah, that’s asking for a weird Thanksgiving. Your coworker? Maybe, but then again…could go south, fast. The yogi you met at the gym who’s sexy as hell, but not someone you’d want to pursue a serious relationship with? Now you’re talking.

Step 2: Set the ground rules.

Justin says that in his research, the FWB’s who are most successful prioritize communication, and get that piece down first. Mutual attraction is the easy part, folks! What you’re really looking for is someone who can answer the following questions:

• What are you looking to get out of this?
• Are you OK with the things I want from this?
• Is there anything off-limits? Sexual activities, couple-y behaviors, etc?

If you can navigate this conversation, and find the other person to be mature and realistic in doing so, then congratulations: you may have just found yourself a playmate! But a word of caution here — it’s a lot easier to do this with someone who wants the same things you do, rather than convincing someone to try it.

So be aware that in the initial communication, you should be clear that this isn’t a trial period for an actual relationship, or an on-ramp to something more serious. Don’t be a smooth talker; be frank, honest, and a good listener. That will help both parties make a wise decision.

Step 3: Have sex…safely.

You’re doing it: you’re accruing “benefits!” Yay you. But even if emotional expectations have been managed, your fertility and STI status are just as serious. So while this one is (hopefully) obvious, give your FWB arrangement some standard protocols:

• Use contraception, and communicate about it openly
• Have both parties get tested in advance of play time
• Create a communication policy around outside partners and STI status

These rules will not only keep things drama-free, but will also help keep your communication skills in check. Which brings me to:

PLEASE VISIT THE LINK BELOW TO READ THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE

Source: https://sexwithemily.com/the-guide-to-a-successful-friends-with-benefits-relationship/

This article was written by SexWithEmily.com. To read the full article, please visit http://sexwithemily.com/oral-kivin-method/

There’s a trendy new oral sex method that has many women singing from the rooftops.

It’s called The Kivin Method, and today we are going to teach you all the juicy details…

WHY TRY THE KIVIN METHOD?

Both bloggers and sex therapists are all abuzz with this Kivin Method. Many are even claiming that it provides orgasms within 5-10 minutes for any vulva owner. We believe it’s important not to be goal-oriented about sex having to lead to orgasm, and that faster isn’t necessarily better. However, The Kivin Method claims to increase the intensity of orgasms, and enhance overall pleasure, and we are down to support that!

Even if you are in a great oral sex routine already, and consistently experiencing pleasure and orgasms, it’s good to be receptive to experiencing pleasure in different ways. Vulva owners have anatomy that is capable of multiple different types of orgasms and pleasure, so try something new today.

Every vulva owner is vastly different in what, when, and how they enjoy receiving oral sex. So it’s important to note that what floats one person’s boat isn’t always going to float another. Because of that, it’s crucial that you utilize lots of communication when giving or receiving oral sex.

Let your partner know you’d like to try a new technique with them, and ask if they are comfortable with that, and ask for verbal feedback during and after.

HOW TO KIVIN

The Kivin Method has three key aspects to master that differ from the ‘traditional’ cunnilingus style; positioning, direction, and physical feedback. Let’s dive into each element so we can master the technique together.

Perfection Positioning

With ‘traditional cunnilingus positioning’, we usually see the giver in between the receiver’s legs, facing towards their partner. Their nose points towards the belly button and their chin towards the booty. Hopefully, you’re with me so far, because this is where it gets a little…sideways.

With this method, the giver actually lays perpendicular to their partner, at a 90-degree angle, making somewhat of a capital ‘T’ with their bodies. So instead of looking upwards at the clit, you’re looking at it sideways.

You can experiment with coming in from either side of your partner’s body. Because most vulva owners have one side of their clit that is more sensitive than the other, it’s a good idea to try both sides and ask them which was their fave.

You can tackle this positioning a couple of different ways. Choose what works best based on your physical comfort, as well as the receivers sensitivity preference. If the vulva owner enjoys being widely spread for maximum stimulation, suggest they pull their legs back for more intense stimulation. Some people prefer closed legs and the sensation of the labia massaging the sides of the clitoris. In that case, suggest they keep their legs down and open their legs enough for your tongue to get in and do its magic.

Delightful Directions

There are a few techniques to master with your hands for this move. With your left hand, place your index finger and thumb on either side of the clitoris to raise it and help keep it in place while you lick. Communicate verbally with your partner as to what finger positioning feels best for them, and adjust accordingly.

PLEASE VISIT THE LINK BELOW TO READ THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE.

Source: http://sexwithemily.com/oral-kivin-method/

A swingers club can be a great place to explore SOME fetishes! We came across this article by Allure that lists 11 common fetishes ranging from bondage to anal sex. Try something new (with consent!) this weekend at Trapeze Club!

1. Impact Play

Impact play means spanking, flogging, paddling, and other forms of consensual striking. Spanking is often an easy and safe BDSM entry point that leads to exploring more, such as purchasing a crop to use with a partner. Impact play can range from a light slap on the bum to a crack of the whip.

As with any kink or fetish, it’s important to negotiate boundaries beforehand. “Safety and comfort are the most important aspects of kink,” Renye says. Do your homework before practicing impact play. Discuss the level of intensity you enjoy (or your partner enjoys), choose a safe word to shut down the action on a dime if need be, and learn what parts of the body are safe to impact. Stick with the meaty areas, like the ass and thighs, and avoid less protected areas where organs live, like the lower back. For both financial savings and safety, it’s a good idea to start out simply using your hand before investing in bigger and badder impact play toys, for example a whip or paddle.

2. Role-Playing

You don’t have to stop playing make-believe when you grow up. Role-playing means acting out a sexual fantasy with your partner(s), either once or as part of an ongoing fantasy, Renye says. While it can be a fetish or kink within itself, it’s also a healthy way to act out other fantasies. For instance, if you have a medical fantasy, and are aroused by doctors, you probably don’t actually want your doctor to get sexy with you because that would be creepy and abusive. The beauty of role-playing is that you can have your partner dress up as a doctor and indulge your fantasy consensually in your own home.

Role-playing scenarios range from classic schoolgirl-and-professor scenes to the more taboo, such as daddy dom and little girl. “There’s a huge stigma on daddy and brat/princess play, but I love it. I can’t have sex without calling someone daddy,” Stephanie says. Such role-playing can involve both age play, in which one partner pretends or both partners pretend to be an age other than their own, and incest fantasies. It’s not unusual for a fetish to overlap into one or more categories.

3. Foot Fetish

A foot fetish involves a desire to worship feet through acts such as massage, kissing, and smelling. As professional dominatrix Goddess Aviva told Allure, it’s an extremely common fetish. If your partner shares that they have a foot fetish, it may be initially jarring, but it’s an opportunity for you to discuss a potentially exciting new part of your sex life together. (And, if you’re into it, just think of all the foot massages headed your way!)

4. Anal Sex

You don’t need to have an anal fetish to engage in anal sex, but plenty of people do specifically get off on butt stuff. Anal play can range from adding a finger in the ass during penetrative vaginal sex to using butt plugs to having anal sex with a penis or a dildo. In a recent study, 37 percent of women and 43 percent of men said they had engaged in anal sex (in which women received and men gave).

Stephanie says that she’s observed anal play become more socially acceptable since she began exploring kink in college, and she credits mainstream media for helping to destigmatize the act (think of the infamous rimming scene in Girls, where Marnie gets her ass eaten, or the epic Broad City episode where Jeremy asks Ilana to peg him). Since the butthole is not self-lubricating and harbors bacteria that can lead to infection when transferred to the vagina, it’s important to stock up on lube and read up on ass etiquette before engaging in anal play. That includes safer sex precautions such as condom use.

5. Lingerie

Renye says that one of the most common fetishes centers on something that may be sitting inside your dresser right now: lingerie. “[This] may show up in sexual play between and among individuals who may not even consider themselves kinky or to have a fetish (or two or three),” she says. Again, while many people get aroused by sexy underwear, lingerie becomes a fetish when someone needs it to be present in a sexual scenario in order to fully engage or get off. A common lingerie fetish involves stockings, a fetish that can overlap with a love of feet. Lingerie is an example of the lesser-used definition of a fetish: an attraction to an object. 

6. Group Sex

Group sex is getting it on with more than one person. If you’ve ever swiped on Tinder, you’re likely aware that many couples are searching for a third, although group sex can mean more than just a threesome. An orgy is when a group of people of all genders have sex, while a gangbang typically refers to one person having sex with more than two members of another gender (while the term has past violent connotations, it’s used in the kink community to refer to consensual scenarios). The most talked-about type of gangbang is a woman being penetrated by multiple penises. However, men can be gangbanged by multiple women, while with strap-ons, anyone can play out a penetrative gangbang. If you have a group sex fetish or kink but realistically only want to have sex with one other person, try using porn, dirty talk, or role-playing with the use of sex toys to explore within your current relationship.

7. Sensation Play

Sensation play can refer to a huge range of activities based on the receiving or withholding of different stimuli. For instance, one partner may blindfold the other to deprive them of their sense of sight, a form of sensory deprivation, or they may drag an ice cube along their skin, a form of sensation play known as temperature play. When it comes to giving sensation, think of everything from tickling a partner with your hands or a feather to biting them. Impact play is sometimes placed under the category of sensation play.

8. Orgasm Control

Orgasm control is part of BDSM, as it involves an element of dominance and submission. Edging, in which the submissive partner is brought to the brink of climax and then forced to stop — often done repeatedly — is an example of orgasm control. The idea here is that for as long as you like, you let your partner take the reins and determine when and how you come. As with all of the activities here, anyone can engage in orgasm control regardless of their genitalia.

9. Bondage

Bondage is when one partner restrains the other. It’s usually a form of dominance and submission and falls under the BDSM umbrella. You can bind your partner using objects you already have around, such as a belt, or purchase specialty kink items like handcuffs. To engage in restraint play safely, establish boundaries and a safe word, emphasize consent and communication at every step, and start slow. (And take care not to cut off anyone’s circulation!)

10. Psychological Play

While physical actions, such as spanking, are often the most discussed kinks and fetishes, some of the most intense sexual play takes place in the mind. Renye refers to psychological power play as “mind control,” and it’s a type of BDSM. Psychological play involves implementing a sexual power exchange: Humiliation play, for example, might involve a submissive partner getting off on being called names. Consensual threats are an example of psychological play; one example is a domme warning a male submissive with a foot fetish that he’ll have to lick her feet if he doesn’t fall in line and do exactly as she says.

11. Voyeurism

A study on fetishes published in the Journal of Sex Research found voyeurism — or obtaining sexual pleasure from watching others who are naked or having sex — to be one of the most common fetishes. Of course, as with every other fetish, engage in voyeurism consensually, for example at a sex party where a couple has given you permission to watch; watching someone without their permission is never acceptable. The flip side of voyeurism is exhibitionism, which means achieving sexual pleasure by allowing others to watch you. (A sex party is a great setting in which to do this, too.)

Happy Swinging!

Source:

Thomas, Sophie Saint. “11 Sexual Fetishes That Are Way More Common Than You’d Think.” Allure, Allure, 1 Nov. 2017, www.allure.com/story/common-sexual-fetishes-kinks.

Written by SwingersHelp.com. Visit https://swingershelp.com/top-swinger-date-ideas/ to read the full article.

Congratulations, you’ve found a great swinger couple to meet up & have fun. Now the hard part, trying to figure out what to do on your swinger date. We all know swingers eventually want to have sexy fun but how do we have fun before sexy time? Where do swingers go and what activities are a good idea to help jump start the sexy flirting and naughty teasing? Today’s your luck day, we have plenty of options and helpful tips to make picking the right swinger date plans for you.

General Dating Tips

Here are the basic concepts of what we all want to happen during a sexy swinger date.

• We want the chance for flirty chatting, so nothing too loud or places we can’t talk.
• We want potential for teasing touches, so interactive stuff is super helpful.
• Easy escape if there is no four way connection. Don’t want to be trapped in a bad situation.
• Have fun but nothing to crazy like getting wicked drunk which would stop sexy time.

First Swinger Date Ideas

Swinger Clubs

You might be thinking isn’t this like bringing sand to the beach? Sorta. If you have never met this couple, then meeting at a swinger club can be a very wise choice. Many swingers (especially new ones) will flake out. Maybe they are nervous newbies or maybe their babysitter cancels. There are many reasons for last minute no-shows & they all aren’t fun. If they no-show, you can still have fun and go find another couple at the swinger club. If they do show up, you can have fun playing at the club & save the money you would have spent on a hotel room.

Restaurants

This well-tested date option is a very reliable choice. If possible, find a restaurant that has a spread out layout so you can have more privacy around your table. Try to find a restaurant with plenty of menu options to appeal to everyone. Don’t worry about their dessert menu. Hopefully everything goes so smoothly over dinner and you will all want to pick up dessert and head to a hotel room for sexy playtime.

Pool Hall/Bowling

Shooting some pool at your local pool hall or doing bowling can be really fun. You can grab some drinks and have the guys play against the ladies. This provides good opportunities for flirting and playful touches as you sexily distract each other from making your shots. You can also “help” each other with some hands-on help to make your shots. Plenty of chances to stoke the heat before you move the party to a more private place.

Beer/Wine/Food Festivals

These are great opportunities to walk around, talk and try new things together before you go try new things together in the bedroom. The beer & wine tastings are extra helpful since it keeps the kids away and makes it easier for you to get into a sexier mindset. These festivals have plenty of different options so there is likely something that will appeal to everyone’s different taste.

Private Yoga Class

Yoga clothes can provide a real sexy tease and doing some stretching can help make the later sexy fun even more memorable. If you book a private class, you can also try some of the more risqué poses and even help each other’s partner in those risqué poses.

Date Ideas for Repeating Couples

Hosting At Home

You might have a great swinger setup with a pool, hot-tub and awesome playroom but you should save this for the second or third swinger date. If you have never met the couple, you can’t be sure there will be a sexy four way connection.

Movies

This is a better second or third swinger date idea. Why? Because you can’t talk during movies and you are stuck in your seat. Yes a dark movie theater can be fun but probably not your best option for a first swinger date.

Boating/Tubing/Canoeing

Getting on the water can be super fun. Ladies in their sexy swimsuits & guys trying to keep their eyeballs not falling out from all of their admiring. The issue here is you will be stuck on the water together and unless you are Jesus, its hard to walk away. This option is better suited for well screened swinger couples or second & third swinger dates.

Concerts

These can be super exciting but with the loud music and your dirty dancing as you grind against each other. The problem is they aren’t the best for conversations. That makes it really hard to develop a sexy four way connection on first dates. This is why you probably want to reserve this fun option for only repeat dates with swinger couples you already have established a sexy connection.

Bad Swinger Date Ideas

Here are some swinger date ideas that aren’t the best. You might love them and they might work for you but keep an open mind and read our explanations why these date ideas might not be the best option. To be fair we probably shouldn’t call them bad date ideas and but rather say these are potentially flawed ideas. Be smart and figure out what will work best for you and your swinger friends.

Gun Range

Guns can be a controversial topic & controversy is rarely the best path to sexy fun with new friends. Even if guns aren’t a controversy, its still not a great swinger date because its really hard to chat & flirt while wearing your ear protection & dumping lead downrange. Thirdly, it’s not the smartest idea to wear sexier outfits to the range. Trust us, a hot casing falling down your cleavage isn’t fun.

Live Music Cafes

On the surface, it seems really cool to hit a live jazz joint or an open mic night. The potential problem is many musicians and venues don’t allow talking during the live music so it can be hard to connect & flirt. If you or they are performing, you can’t be sure the others will appreciate the performance. There are probably much better options for your swinger dates.

Museums

Unless its the Museum of Sex in NYC, you probably don’t want to pick a museum for your swinger get-together. They tend to be much quieter places so you need to be careful not to be overheard. Plus they don’t usually inspire sexy thoughts. Why not choose something more exciting and enticing?

Shopping

It might sound like fun to go shopping for lingerie, wine or whatever else together. This can be prone to awkwardness. Even if you find something you want to buy like lingerie or a sex toy, it won’t help that night because you won’t be able to wash it. Not to mention you can’t be sure about another couple’s financial situation. We don’t want to accidentally embarrass another couple for how much or how little they spend while shopping. It is safer if we minimize the impact money has the swinger dates.

Escape Room

This is not the best idea. Why? It is interactive and it is fun. It only gives you a semi-private place to be playful and work together, but remember there are cameras and a minimum wage high school kid is probably monitoring them. You probably need to watch what you say or touch while doing this. It can be a good option if you want a slower first date, but most swingers aren’t looking to take the slower & more vanilla-like approach.

Gym

Yes, plenty of swingers love to spend time in the gym but that doesn’t make it a wise swinger date. The more you all enjoy your gym workout the less energy you all will have for your bedroom workout. Probably smarter if you pick something less intense so you don’t end up blocking yourself from having sexy time.

Triple Date

You may love group swinger sex but arranging a date with multiple couples at once can be a bad recipe especially if it’s the first time meeting any of the couples. Even if you have met these couples separately, you can’t be sure how it will go when mixing couples. That can really change the dynamics & you can’t always be sure the other couples will be into each other. If you really want group fun, probably better to plan a swinger house party so everyone understands the situations and has more flexibility to do what they want.

What are some of your swinger date ideas?

Happy Swinging!

VISIT THE LINK BELOW TO VIEW THE FULL ARTICLE:

Source: https://swingershelp.com/top-swinger-date-ideas/

This article was written by Amanda Kohr on SexWithEmily.com. To read the full article, please visit https://sexwithemily.com/10-super-hot-ways-to-pleasure-a-penis/

Let’s talk about penises. As you probably know, penises are incredibly vulnerable to sensation—for better or worse. We’re focusing on the “better” as we share 10 penis sex tips designed to make your partner’s (or your own) nether regions feel amazing.

Keep in mind that this list is by no means comprehensive, nor will every tip work for every penis. The trick is to find ideas that work for you and the penis-owner in your life. And when trying new things, remember to ask for consent and check-in with your partner as you explore together.

Now then…who’s ready to play?

1. Play with penis rings.

It’s a common misconception that toys are purely for vulva-owners. I have good news for you: there are tons of toys out there, specifically designed for penis play. A nice entry-level option is the penis ring. When placed at the base of the penis, it applies pressure to the surrounding area, causing the blood vessels to constrict or tighten. This allows blood flow to leave the penis more slowly, AKA—longer and harder erections. (Oh, boy!)

There are even some penis rings out there that come with a “vibration” element, which can provide an added dose of pleasure for both the wearer and a vulva-owning partner. We’re especially fond of the Mio from Je Joue. the unique motor creates ultra-low-frequency vibrations, which feel like they travel further into the body than those from some other “buzzy” vibrating toys.

2. Practice edging.

It’s not unusual for penis-owners to occasionally experience bouts of “finishing too quickly,” or premature ejaculation. But—and this is a big but—there are things you can do to elongate playtime.

One way to keep the sexy times going is to practice edging. While playing with a penis, get your partner close to finishing—but don’t go all the way. Think of it as a 1-10 scale: if 10 is explosive orgasm, and 1 is asleep, you want to take them to a 7 or 8 level, then bring them back down to a 4 or 5…only to rev them back up again, to another tantalizing edge.

Keep this up for as long as they can handle it. Not only does it make the final finish that much hotter, but it can also help increase your partner’s stamina.

3. Utilize a delay spray.

Another idea is to bring in reinforcements, because listen – penises are sensitive, and that’s ok. But by applying a topical “delay spray,” penis-owners develop more control over their orgasms and aren’t so at the mercy of their nervous system. Here’s the deal: the penis is full of nerve endings (fun!), especially at the top where the glans and the frenulum are located. When the spray is applied to the penis, it helps those nerve endings be a little less reactive. One popular option is Promescent’s Delay Spray, which is absorbed into the nerve cells just below the skin, and basically slows down how quickly your nerve endings tell your body to orgasm. More fun for everyone!

4. Take away their hands.

Have you ever heard the phrase “forced receiving”? Despite the name, it’s a consensual act (very important), where you restrain your partner so that you can take your sweet time pleasuring them—and, it’s one of our favorite penis sex tips.

This can be especially electric if the penis owner in your life is more often the “dominant” one in bed — but when you force your partner (literally, because of the restraints) to receive, you’re giving them delicious physical sensations…while enjoying your position of power. (And hey, chances are, it’s hot for them to experience submission.)

To restrain your partner, you can use something around the house (like a bathrobe tie), or you can invest in some legit bondage tools. Beginners might consider bondage tape from Good Vibrations. It only sticks to itself, so it’s an easy and safe way to make sure your partner stays nice and restrained. More advanced folks might like to explore SportSheet’s Under-the-Bed Restraint Systems. It turns any bed into a bondage playground, and has loops for your partner’s arms and legs. They won’t be going anywhere.

Psst. For an added bonus, Good Vibrations is offering 20% off all purchases now through August 31. Affordable and erotic!

5. Bring in the booty.

Not all penis-owners like things in their butt, but many do! Because penis owners have prostates, their anuses are filled with sensitive nerve endings, making it a fun place to explore (if both parties are consenting.) This can be done with a finger or a toy—just make sure you use lots of lube and follow the anal play essentials.

If butt stuff isn’t for you and your partner, there are still other ways to get your partner’s booty in the game. The next time you’re in missionary, grab your partner’s butt cheeks and pull them in deeper. Almost everyone wants to feel wanted (especially during sex) and grabbing your partner’s butt is a way to say, “I want all of you.”

PLEASE VISIT THE LINK BELOW TO READ THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE.

Source: https://sexwithemily.com/10-super-hot-ways-to-pleasure-a-penis/

This article was written by Amanda Kohr on SexWithEmily.com. To read the full article, please visit http://sexwithemily.com/have-good-sex-vanilla/

Let’s talk about vanilla sex. “Vanilla sex” or “vanilla” is often used to describe people whose sex lives are mainstream, plain, or boring. While kink and BDSM have been becoming more and more popular and hogging the sexual spotlight, vanilla sex is often left behind. Some people even use the term in a derogatory sense. But let me clue you in on a little secret: you don’t need to be kinky in order to have good sex. In fact, a pure vanilla experience can be one of the best flavors out there.

I say no more to this “vanilla shaming.” Don’t yuck someone’s else’s yum! Instead, focus on the reasons why vanilla is awesome.

There’s still lots of room to play.

Vanilla is actually a larger category of sex than you might think. Often, vanilla sex includes slower, loving touch, deep kissing, lots of eye contact, and romance. For some, these are key ingredients for good sex.

As one of my kinky friends puts it, “vanilla” really just refers to someone who prefers more straightforward sexual activity. Maybe this is without an overlay of extra thought, planning, or intention that kinks and fetishes do. That doesn’t mean vanilla sex can’t be just as exploratory as kink. Since vanilla tends to focus on the physical act without the psychological influence of say, BDSM, you can take advantage of those physical acts by being fully present and mindful during sex.

It’s the mac-n-cheese of sex.

I once asked one of my friends to describe vanilla sex. She described it as,  “the mac-n-cheese of sex.” Some people might consider mac-n-cheese boring, but there is a reason people love comfort food. Embrace the comfort. Pull it over you like a warm blanket. Juicy, loving vanilla sex with someone you trust is as yummy as a homemade macaroni casserole. Eat it up!

Missionary is underrated. 

Vanilla sex has long been connected to the “missionary” position. Yet, the standard ‘ol position of missionary can be so satisfying and sexy AF. One of the reasons missionary is so hot is the eye contact, and more eye contact often equals more intimacy. For some, this level of connection takes sex from a kindergarten level to magna cum laude (pun intended).

In addition, missionary is sometimes a desirable position for female orgasm, as it can stimulate the clitoris. And if you’ve ever experienced a clitoral orgasm, you know there’s nothing boring about that.

PLEASE VISIT THE LINK BELOW TO READ THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE.

Source: http://sexwithemily.com/have-good-sex-vanilla/

This article was written by Amanda Kohr on SexWithEmily.com. To read the full article, please visit https://sexwithemily.com/mastering-awkward-positions/

Listen: missionary is fantastic (trust), but sometimes we all want to change it up a bit. And when we do, we reach in our back pocket of sex moves and pull out our experimental material: reverse cowgirl, interesting oral, 69, shower sex…you know, easy things. Not awkward at all,

Except, those ones in particular are actually not easy. They require a little practice, a little leverage, a little positioning—with results that are, at times, less hot AF and more WTF.

That’s why I’ve compiled a “cheat sheet” of pointers for your most asked-about sex positions. From, “how do I get my rhythm right in reverse cowgirl?” to, “how do I have shower sex without slipping and breaking my jaw?” This article provides a step-by-stepof some of the more challenging sex positions and how you can rock reverse cowgirl, oral, 69, and shower sex with as much pleasure (and as little awkwardness) as possible.

Reverse Cowgirl

Reverse Cowgirl is one of those positions that looks unbelievably hot but feels a little weird. Now let’s be clear: it’s great because 1) it provides a fantastic view of the booty, 2) the penetrating partner can place their hands on their partner’s hips, and 3) the person on top can set the rhythm. But setting the rhythm isn’t always easy, and if the person on top has a vulva, Reverse Cowgirl doesn’t necessarily provide clitoral stimulation. What’s a cowgirl to do?

To make this position fun for everyone, try this:

• Start slow. If the penetrating partner has a penis, this position asks their suspensory ligaments to stretch slightly. So once the receiving partner has turned around, straddling their partner’s legs, have them lower down gradually. Before anyone starts thrusting, start with a slow rock.
• Involve hands or a toy. In this position, the penetrating partner has an excellent opportunity to grab their partner’s hips or to prop themselves up on one elbow, and use the other hand to reach around. If you’re performing anal play and the receiving partner has a penis, you can use the freehand for digital stimulation. If the receiving partner has a vulva, the freed-up fingers can stimulate the clitoris with their fingers or a toy. Options!
• Check yourself out. While the bottom partner has an A+ shot of the butt, the view isn’t as exciting for the person on top. So how about doing it in front of a mirror? That way, the top partner can check out the action via their reflection, and PS – research shows that this is a huge turn-on for vulva owners.
• Try a seated variation. Instead of trying it on the bed, you can also practice reverse cowgirl in a chair or on the edge of a bed. In this position, the penetrating partner sits down, feet touching the floor, while the receiving partner sits on their lap, facing forward. This variation is preferable for many, because the penetrating partner is nice and close (and can use their hands to play with breasts or pecs), and if they have a penis, it’s a little easier on their ligaments…keeping things sexy and safe.

Oral Sex: Kivin Method, Facesitting and 69

Okay, oral sex isn’t necessarily a “position”—but maybe you want to simply change your oral game up a bit. Here are my top tips for making oral an unforgettable experience:

Kivin Method

This method differs from traditional oral sex, in that the giver actually lays perpendicular to their partner, at a 90-degree angle, making a capital ‘T’ with their bodies. So instead of looking upwards at the clit, you’re looking at it sideways. Experiment with what side you approach from because most clitorises have a side that is more sensitive than the other. (Science!)

You can tackle this positioning in a few different ways. Choose what works best based on your physical comfort, as well as the receiver’s sensitivity preference. If the vulva owner enjoys being widely spread for maximum stimulation, suggest they bend their knees and pull their legs back, for more intense stimulation.

The trick with this snazzy move is that you’re licking horizontally (instead of the usual vertical direction) across the hood of the clit in a gentle up and down motion, much like you’d eat an ice cream cone. That said, try a few different variations with your tongue to hone in on exactly what your partner likes: the Kivin Method hits more nerve endings than traditional oral, so this should be a fun experiment for both of you.

Face-Sitting

When done correctly, face-sitting can be extremely pleasurable (and erotic) to the person on top. But some folks get so nervous about hurting or suffocating their partner, that they avoid it altogether. Au contraire! You can pull this off safely. Here’s how:

• Kneel into it.  Rather than face-sitting, think of this position more like face-kneeling. Position yourself over your partner by straddling their chest with your knees and scoot forward until you’re in place.
• Use the headboard. You can also have your partner lie closer to a headboard (or for our exhibitionists: a window sill), so you can put your hands on it for extra support. This way, you can distribute your weight with your legs, knees, and arms.
• Play with control. If you’re the “top,” your partner can lie completely still while you do all the moving, grinding as hard or soft as you want on their face, and doing motions that feel the best for you. (The advantage being: your partner won’t strain their jaw). OR, switch roles. Try it where you’re completely still on top, while your partner goes to work…and you’re freed up to focus on the sensations. They can also use a hand to pleasure themselves at the same time, because why not? Either way, be sure to communicate and check in with your partner, to ensure everyone is comfortable.

PLEASE VISIT THE LINK BELOW TO READ THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE.

Source: https://sexwithemily.com/mastering-awkward-positions/

This article was written by Amanda Kohr on SexWithEmily.com. To read the full article, please visit http://sexwithemily.com/bdsm-a-beginners-guide-to-kink/

With the rise in popularity of BDSM and all things kink, there are also a lot of misconceptions going around. Unfortunately, some of the recent movies about BDSM (not naming names *cough*) miss the mark on the cornerstone principles of BDSM for most kinksters.

The principles of BDSM can be extremely beneficial for even the most vanilla couple – even if you’re not ready to implement any of the kinky aspects.

Today we are going to open pandora’s box and let all the kink out, and explore how you can make BDSM work for you.

THE SENSUAL CONSENSUAL

First things first, consent is extremely important in any relationship, regardless of the type of sex life you’d like to have. While some people worry conversation around consent might kill the mood, it can actually be very erotic. Sexual and romantic preferences often change over time – and can even fluctuate with our hormones – so it’s good to regularly check in with your sexual partners (and yourself).

BDSM encourages regular, open dialogue around sexual preferences, creating a safe container for communicating. Plus, this practice enhances intimacy and increases sexual satisfaction. Have you ever wished your partner let you have more time on top? Maybe have sex in your car, or try a butt plug? Well communication is often lubrication, so get talking before you get down! If your partner is curious about something that you aren’t interested in, it’s perfectly fine to tell them so. Regardless of kink, boundaries are an extremely important part of any healthy relationship.

For the kink curious: try writing down a list of your sexual preferences, desires, and boundaries. Then, rank them from 1-5 – 1 being ‘curious to try’ and 5 being ‘want everyday!’ Have your partner do the same, and see how you match up. Is there something new you’ve both been wanting to try? Dip your toes in together. Try lighting a few candles to set the mood, and surprise your partner by dripping some DONA massage candle all over them!

If you’re not that interested in incorporating BDSM in your relationship, even just showing your partner how they could best pleasure you is a wonderful gift to you both. It’s completely fine if your preferences and desires change day to day, just keep communicating them to your partner.

GREAT (SEXUAL) EXPECTATIONS

One of the main challenges many couples face is meeting or missing each others expectations. With BDSM, there are no more hidden meanings, confusing glances, and subtle hints. The expectations are clearly laid out.

Once each person has made their list of desires, preferences, and boundaries, they can compare them together, and look for the compatibilities. Once you can communicate in a clear and loving way about what you’d like out of your sexual relationship, you can work on what would be reasonable expectations for each other.

For the lovely vanilla readers, try talking openly with your partner about your sexual expectations, and see where you may have been missing some puzzle pieces. For the more sexually adventurous readers, why not try making a BDSM contract together? You can make a formal statement of your expectations from your partner, and even sign it Master/slave, or Owner/pet, or any other identifier you can dream up.

If you’re anything like me, you might not even get to the end before you’re jumping into bed! If you’re curious about Bondage, but not sure where to start, try the Under The Bed Restraint System from Sportsheets to experiment with some restriction play, without needing your boy scouts knot badge!

PLEASE VISIT THE LINK BELOW TO READ THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE.

Source: http://sexwithemily.com/bdsm-a-beginners-guide-to-kink/

Written by SexWithEmily.com

“Hark, the herald angels sing…” And by “angels,” I mean you, having sex at your relatives’ house, singing in ecstasy. Except…no.

You want privacy. I get it. You want a silent night, even while getting yours in the night. (Or morning. Or afternoon. Whenever you like!)

Having sex while traveling requires a bag of tricks, including the means to enjoy pleasure quietly – but also, knowing how to travel with toys, which items to pack, and most importantly, how to have sex in small spaces. So let’s talk through all the ways to do it in rooms that are not your own because if there’s one thing we can all agree on, sex and the ears of our parents (or nephews or grandparents or fifth cousins) do not mix. But that doesn’t mean you have to forego – you just need some hacks, while you pleasure yourselves in your old twin bed after a night of wholesome board games.

Here now, the top do’s and don’ts for itinerant pleasure: 

DO feel good about packing your sex toys.

In the U.S., sex toys are approved by TSA for travel in both carry-on and checked bags. So when you’re packing, know that any toy you pack is probably fine. This brings us to…

DO choose peace and quiet. 

If you’re masturbating, the peace part will take care of itself (wink wink). But as for quiet? That’s when we want to be strategic, and bring a toy that specifically boasts its low volume.

If you’re a vulva owner and residing in a communal space (Christmas at your great aunt’s house), you can’t go wrong with a toy like the JeJoue Mimi. It has an internal motor set to low frequency, with a signature “rumble” – meaning, you’re likely to feel the vibes deeper in your body, hitting more pleasure points. But since it’s less buzzy than a traditional vibrator, it’s also more discreet, aaand it’s waterproof.  We’re especially obsessed with JeJoue’s Naughty Gift Set which includes the Mimi PLUS a massage candle, a blindfold and restraint, and an intimate game of truth or dare. (For when everyone else has gone to bed…)

DO have sex in the shower.

I mean, why not? You probably went to bed at 9:00pm after Elf and Yahtzee. How about you wake up early before everyone else, head to the shower with your friends (partner and sex toy) and come down to breakfast ready for the day? Taking on the world, folks! But in all seriousness, shower sex = silent sex, because the noise helpfully drowns everything out. And it’s a sensual environment. AND you have afore-mentioned waterproof vibes. Great sex tip, or greatest sex tip?

DO consider a hotel.

Look at you, being so cosmopolitan! For real though, if the host home is cramped, why not take a glamorous night to yourselves? Even if it’s a “glamorous” Best Western? Sex in unfamiliar places is just plain exciting, and with this kind of privacy, you can indulge however you like.

DON’T forget to lock the door.

OK, pretend we’re back to the OG holiday plan: you’re at your relatives house, you’re ready to get laid, everyone else is on a walk. Let’s do it! But please, for the love of Santa’s reindeer lock that door, so as to avoid being walked in on (horrors). When you’re in the heat of the moment, it’s easy to not hear things…like the front door opening…like Grandma looking for you guys…like the door knob turning…yeahhh. Let’s avoid this nightmare-slash-rom com, and lock that door.

DON’T overlook fun “extras.”

Let’s talk all the other little ways you can make travel sex extra dreamy.

Are you packing lube? Of course you are. Just make sure it’s in a 3.4 oz (or less) container if you’re flying. Are you packing underthings that make you feel sexy? Do it! Try wrapping them up in your regular clothes, if you don’t want them being discovered by curious nephews and nieces. Are you packing your phone charger? I imagine so, but you’ll definitely want it if you use your phone for music or other “ambient noise” while you play. (So as to prevent the very unfortunate situation of approaching orgasm, and having your phone suddenly die.)

DON’T be afraid of car sex.

You mean to tell me you’ve never given your partner a thorough and significant tour of your hometown?? Why not offer one, just the two of you? Heck, who needs stuff at the grocery store? You guys can get it! On the way, park somewhere discreet and…you know what to do. (Just make sure you actually do go to the grocery store and don’t return to the house blissfully empty-handed.)

DON’T forget to clean up.

After you’ve successfully sexed, do the courteous thing and clean up all evidence. Yes, you are an adult with a vibrant, adult sex life, but also…you’re still your parents’ precious baby. Forever. Help them not see your flavored condoms, and tidy up.

Untethered from our normal routines, the holidays are an awesome time to have sex. So enjoy the bon vivant energy! Now you’ve got a prep list, so your sex-on-the-go can be as adventurous as you are.

Source: https://sexwithemily.com/how-to-have-sex-while-traveling/

Written by Alex Anderson on SexWithEmily.com

There are certain times in life where shorter is always better, like taking a trip to the DMV. But when it comes to the bedroom, we’re here to help you last as long as you like. If there’s one thing most people are dying to know, it’s how “normal” they are compared to everyone else. There is no “normal” but we do know the average post-foreplay romp lasts between 7 and 9 minutes. This can be great for penis-owners, who typically only need about 5 minutes to get to the finish line. Although, sometimes it’s nice to have the option to last longer in bed. While the orgasm gap is alive and well, there’s nothing to fear. Check out these 4 tips for lasting longer in bed.

Try using a delay spray.

When you’re the penetrator, getting a little over-excited is totally understandable. Whether it’s a natural reaction or due to something more biological, the answer could lie in a delay spray’s magic. A topical product engineered to prolong ejaculation, Promescent is a game-changing elixir for not only those who experience premature ejaculation but anyone who wants to last longer in bed, period. With just a few spritzes and ten minutes of wait time, the formula absorbs just below the skin’s surface; this is where all of the key nerve endings that control climax happen to dwell. In return, it numbs your member just enough to tack on a few extra, confidence-boosting minutes to your sultry love session. And, it won’t transfer to your partner either!

Play with edging.

Teasing to please, orgasm control, the art of antici…pation—whatever you want to call it, the practice of edging can be a slow-burning solution to all your uncontrollably hasty woes. By delaying your orgasm multiple times during sex or masturbation, you’re lengthening the experience while repeatedly flexing all of those pelvic floor muscles. And since we know toned PC’s equal increased stamina to last longer in bed as well as stronger orgasms, you can build your way up to a fiery grand finale, unlike anything you’ve ever experienced.

Slow things down.

Whether consciously or not, the more you obsess about finishing, the more focus you lose on maximizing pleasure along the way. Instead, try savoring the moment and being truly present with your partner. Even practicing something as simple as breathing provides the chance to center yourself. It helps to not stress about the pressure of how “fast” you are (or aren’t) performing. By paying attention to every touch and move, and all the sensations that each elicits, you’re bound to find even more enjoyment in the experience that also happens to last longer in bed, too.

There’s no denying the fun that comes with being able to last longer in bed and the accompanying perks like boosted sexual confidence, satisfaction, and intimacy. So, if you’re looking for an erotic extension to get your sex life on a more fulfilling track, give these tips a shot.

Source: https://sexwithemily.com/4-tips-for-lasting-longer-in-bed/