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Written by SwingersHelp.com.
So you’re interested in swinging? Whatever has attracted you to the lifestyle, swinging can be a great way to have some fun, meet new people, and explore yourself and your partner.
But where do you start? The information out there can be daunting, so we’ve compiled an easy step-by-step list of everything you need to do to.
Is swinging right for you?
First thing’s first, make sure that swinging is right for you. What is it you want to get out of swinging? Do you have a particular fantasy you want to act out, or are you concerned your sex life with your partner has cooled off a bit too much, or maybe you want to explore being with someone of the same sex? Establishing these aims are really important to make sure the other steps go as smoothly as possible.
Also ask yourself if you are in the right mental place. Can you fend off your anxieties while your partner is with someone else? How strong is your relationship at the moment? Are you feeling secure and safe, do you and your partner trust each other?
While swinging can be a great bonding experience for the both of you, swinging can not fix broken relationships – it tends to only make them fail faster. Make sure your own relationship is doing well before you move onto any of the other steps.
It is also important to ask yourself if you are looking for no strings attached sex, or would you like a more emotional connection? If the latter, polyamory might be more for you.
Ask yourself these questions, and really explore them yourself before approaching your partner. The next bit can be intimidating for both parties, but it will help if you have a clear idea of what you want and why you want it. P.S It is also important to ask yourself if you are looking for no strings attached sex, or would you like a more emotional connection? If it’s the latter, polyamory might be more for you.
Have the conversation with your partner
Once you have established that swinging is right for you, you need to open the swinging conversation with your partner.
It can be a difficult, but use your aims from the previous step to guide the conversation. You could bring up some mutual friends who are out as swingers, and ask what your partner thinks. Or suggest watching some swinger movies and videos together of swinging couples.
However you do it, pick the time and place wisely. For most people, this is in the evening when the kids are in bed, and you can have some private time catching up in the day. For others, it could be during sex.
Be honest in the conversation, and communicate your feelings, concerns, and curiosities. Be patient with your partner – you might have been ruminating on this for weeks, or longer, but they might have never considered it and they might be reacting out of instinct or insecurity.
Working out how you want to start swinging
If your partner is interested, it’s time to move onto the next step. There are plenty of different ways to swing. Are you going to approach some close friends who you know are into swinging? Are you going to go to a private party? Or would you be more interested in the anonymity of a larger swingers club?
You could even create an online dating profiles together to find other couples for something more private and intimate, and meet for coffee first if the idea of strangers feels too nerve-wracking.
Many people prefer to start swinging in smaller groups, but others find this more intimidating. Check out your local area, and see what feels right for you both.
Establishing your boundaries
Now it’s time for another conversation. You need to establish your boundaries, both as individuals and as a couple. Ask yourself what you feel comfortable with exploring at your first swingers event.
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Source: https://swingershelp.com/start-swinging-beginners-guide/